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Old guys make a run for the Finals

As I was driven eastward on Mona Vale road last evening on the way home, I looked to the dark spring sky and saw that the moon was as full as cheap bottle of wine.

My Driver, the VC, was babbling on about how great he played and that for me to write the report was pivotal on the world knowing of his greatness.

I tried hard to listen but the siren's song of the Sea of Tranquility on the moon's surface drew me away from his constant vitriol on his elite performance in which the Men formerly known as the OverTouchers overcame another bunch of young Bucks and one Deer.

Taking a looping pass from his toes, Bulldog scored a magnificent try in the shadows of the post to take the score to 7-6 and register their first official win of the 2016 season which puts the team up into Finals contention.

The sound of the hooter was akin to the old guys victory call from high atop the Hills of Terrey.

Now I have referred to the term 'old guys' and  'young bucks' and I do so to place an exclamation point on the nights performance. 

Before the shrill of the opening whistle, a scouting report was delivered that the young team in their description of their opponents had used these words and I quote "...we are playing a bunch of old guys...". Now the description was not delivered in a derogatory tone, nor was it in jest. But the words could have been enough to spur the launch of a 1,000 ships or maybe give the 8 men formerly known as Touchers the reason to fire up.

When the scouting report was leaked to these 'old guys', the reaction was one of pragmatism; 

"Well its actually true" declared the speedster Scarry. 

A joint nodding of the balding heads [well some of us have the balding heads, the rest of you are just lucky b@stards] confirmed the description of the team that the young bucks were playing.

The playing roster was not looking good yesterday afternoon, a mere 90 minutes before the game there were callouts from a few players to say they couldn't make the big occasion. 

The Chairman had called in to say he was nursing an ailing family.

BBB had a "meeting" that he felt was more important than representing the corporation.

Oh and Bulldog was complaining of chest pains. Geesh, who doesn't get those and still battles on. He visited the hospital and was put through a series of checks. He didn't mind the poke and prodding I can report. 

Diagnosis: "Nothing wrong with ya mate now get out there and win the game"

Others to let us know of more important things they had to do were Rookie/Claw/Leftie who was down in Mexico on very important business. My sources tell me he went for further surgery on his hurty finger.



Milt was also away on assignment. He was in deepest darkest North Korea in secret talks with the supreme leader Kim Jong Oon on behalf of the UN. I didn't hear how the high level talks are going but I can inform that others at the lunch said the Bulgogi Beef was very good

The Locksmith was also declared absent due to work commitments. There is no truth to the rumour that he was sent to San Fran to re-sign Jarryd to a multi year contract at Parramatta with the young blokes career on the line. 

Now there was one other player missing and my spies cannot find a scent of a trace. Kiwi was a distinct no show with no message. Now I am just guessing here and I could be wrong, but with the World Cup Final this weekend, he is in such fear of a loss to his beloved All Blacks that he has gone into to the fetal position already. That's just my speculation of course, the crazy bugger may well be on the plane jetting his way to the game. C'mon the Wallaby's.

With just minutes before kick off the playing roster started to make shape, BBB cancelled his high level executive meeting, The Chairman told his ailing girls that Tagging was more important and the VC strapped himself up, not for the game, he just likes the feel of tight strapping!!!

I guess I should report on the game as that is the primary purpose of this communication. 

With the minimum allocation of 8 players the 'old guys' took the field with *hope in their hearts and wings on their feet.

*Chariots of Fire the 1981 British historical drama film

The young bucks were fast fit and full of vigour. SuperCoach also told them they were full of other stuff but this is a PG rated report and I cannot write what that something was.

The team was great across the park from Jonty on one wing and Bulldog on the other, to BBB, Scarry and VC terrorising the middle of the park. The Chairman and I did our best to direct traffic and SuperCoach.....mmmmmmmmmmmm.........well he just cleaned up all our mess when it was needed.

The distribution of the pill was back to its best and showed why the team formerly known as the Touchers made 5 Grand Finals in 5 years and won 3.

But last night it was the defence that was the improvement. Yes that fast guy split us like a tear in a young lady's tight fishnet stocking late on Cup Day. But the 'old guys' managed the damage consistently over the 40 minutes. 

SuperCoach provided me personally with some key advice at the half time break, 

"Full Metal defend at marker big fella"

I asked inquisitively as to why he provided such advice, thinking that he felt the his advice was to highlight a strength in my game, his reply 

"You'll do less damage there".  

He may have a point as I made just my second tag in 2 weeks last night, its a stupid bl00dy game.

With under a minute to go the scores were locked at 6 a piece. With the clock ticking down I scooped the ball up from the dummy half with one hand and flew like an eagle to my right dropping off runners underneath me and dummying to those out wide, as I charged to the line I drew in three players and found a whole for the Bulldog who hit the line at pace and was provided with a saloon passage to the try line and to victory.

Well that's how I recalled it. 

Others told me after the match that I picked up the ball at the dummy half. tripped over and as I was falling, flung the ball with my eyes closed and only due the fleet of foot and deft of hands Bulldog did the majority of the work to score the match winning try.

I am sure the truth lies somewhere in the middle.

Yours in delusions of grandeur

Full Metal

Comments

  1. Sensational FMJ!!!....your talents maybe wasted at that betting organisation!!

    ReplyDelete

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